James and I have discovered the sex of our baby. Ya’ll ready for this? As I prepared myself for this ultimate reveal—this all-defining moment—I realized the enormous importance my society places on gender. I have a pregnant cousin who’s choosing to not to peek at her baby’s sex. She told me that the question, “Do you know what you’re having?” irks her. She wants to answer,…
Dear Little One, I write this letter early in the morning light. It’s the day when I’ll find out a huge part of you. In the moments before I learn whether you’re a little boy or a little girl, I cradle my tummy and feel the warmth there. You’ve been keeping me up at night. Perhaps you get restless when I am restless. Can you feel…
Sleep, little child, and dream for me Dream me a white-plumed apple tree All a-bloom in the early spring Dream me a song to sing -“Apple Tree,” Songs from Dreamland From lullabies to We-Sing videos, I spent hours and hours of my childhood singing. I never forgot what I sang. There was collection of lullabies called Songs from Dreamland that my parents played on a cassette…
In this second post on my Creative Republic map, I have a few more creative territories of my mind to explore. Canyons-These are the dangerous and blessed places where I can chuck all of my discouragement and worries. I let them tumble into my canyons, then offer up a prayer, and walk away. I know I may never be fully rid of my doubts, but I’ll…
As most of you know, my pregnancy has been knocking the wind out of me—more literally, I’ve been an exhausted clump of hormones for the last few weeks and it hasn’t been pretty. However, I take this giant energy-drain to mean that the Child Within will be an awesome force to be reckoned with…and that still makes me smile. My firstborn isn’t the only thing consuming…
Since I've dubbed my world The Creative Republic, I thought I’d give you a peek at the map of my landmarks and favorite places. Mountains-In the distance rise the towering spires of the achievements I dream about. I yearn to climb them with quick and powerful strokes, but every day isn’t a mountain-climbing day, and sometimes I have to turn my back to them and stare…
It was one of those synchronistic moments—she and I had chosen a long list of exactly the same presentations to attend as part of our freshman orientation, but then it surpassed a funny coincidence. We couldn’t stop talking. She asked me about my family, and though I answered with the usual bits of info (number of my siblings and their ages), she immediately told me about…
As a little girl, my favorite color was red for the longest time, but then the Power Rangers came along and I switched it to yellow (because the Red Ranger was a boy and I wasn’t about to be like every other girl who liked the Pink Ranger.) Colors are clearly emotional for me. Yesterday I was painting a landscape for my husband (see below). He…
As bad for me as it may be, I constantly want to know my future. It’s probably got something to do with my over-active planner gene that came into full expression sometime during college. I understand the fear of the unknown, the anxiety that just wants to get to the “other side” so I know what I’m up against. I find it impossible to not be…
“For gosh sakes, treat them better than they deserve! Who would ever escape misery, otherwise?” -Hamlet (liberally paraphrased by Elise Stephens) I have begun the most demanding creative project of my life. Growing a little human being inside of me is a harrowing, mystical, and unparalleled experience. I am a mother. I will raise another life to the light. I am flat on my back,…