Sunset on Lake purple Light

I’m a bit obsessed with prioritizing.

Sometimes I divide my life so carefully into priorities, I create a hierarchy of things that are “worthy” and “unworthy” of the time I can presently give. This works fine and helps narrow my focus when I’m in survival mode. It allows me to just do what I can to meet immediate needs and make sure nothing catches on fire (and now that I have a toddler, that no longer needs to be a figurative sense of fire).

The thing is, when my crisis has passed or the massive project is finally complete, I step out of my survival mode and, after a moment of gloriously resting that lasts about 24 hours, I decide that the things I’d been ignoring are dull and uninteresting and perhaps should be ignored indefinitely. (I’m quite certain this is not a completely healthy way to view life’s less-than-thrilling necessities (i.e. answering emails and paying bills)).

I enjoy living with work piled high around me and a frantic energy to tackle as much of it as I possibly can, but I’m also seeing the toll it takes on my emotional outlook, my levels of energy, my relationship with my husband, my ability to help other people, my patience with my son…to name a few. All-consuming artistic projects are fun. They’re draining.

They have a cost.

I can’t naively think it’s possible to move from the end of one project into the beginning of another (though you should see my brain try to convince me!). I can’t make my temporary divisions of “high priority” and “low priority” activities remain the same. There’s a time to play catch-up.

It’s actually a healthy thing.


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